Wednesday, January 25, 2012


Wow it's been forever, and so much has changed! First the weight, my goal weight which I hit on December 24, 2009 was 145, I got there but it didn't take long to keep fluctuating up and down. In the last 6 months I gained 10-15 lbs. don't ask cause I really don't know how. I think it had to do with other life changes, me getting older, life being too still, I need to move my butt. Also, had so many health issues. Anyway, finally had surgery on 1/4/2012 to take care of 3 hernias, 2 of which had my intestine involved and were dangerous. also, had a biopsy cause dr found a tumor in there but it was benign, thank you God. today I'm 3 weeks out of surgery and recovering very slowly. This is 3rd surgery in 3 years and longest, hardest recovery. I'm back to work since last week and still hurting. yesterday was very uncomfortable. I'm not in pain, agony, per say but I hurt and I hate sitting here all day. I still have to move slowly and be careful. Anyway, the good news is that I'm losing weight again, finally. I haven't been able to eat much or like usual since surgery, for whatever reason my insides are still swollen and my food won't go down normal, and even though my activity level is at zero since surgery, I still have been losing weight. down 8 lbs from my gain. I want 145 again, even less, but right now my goal is 5 more lbs to get me under 150, then I'll take it from there. I have been taking CoQ10 regularly and vitamins that all help with metabolism so maybe it's helping. as soon as I'm 100% mobile, gonna start exercising somehow, a gym or alot of walking. In 2011, 3 people close to me had the surgery, my coworker, my grandchildrens auntie and my cousin. I've been trying to be a mentor to all 3, they are doing so wonderfully, and I am proud that maybe I am an example and I inspired them to go fot it. They are all happier because of their decision.So on the personal front 2011, hhmm, let me see I went online, met someone and I'm engaged! Robert & I met on and were engaged 4 months later on his 50th bd. He's awesome, not like any guy I've been with before, appearance wise or behavior wise, but he loves me so much and he's so wonderful to me and my family. I love love his family, he is 1 of 6 and they are great people. We are trying to get hitched this year, just need to get through our premarital counseling but because of his work schedule it's difficult to get to class. Also, 12/31/2011, Brittany moved out with Travis - 3 1/2 & Lily - 2, it breaks my heart a little but there is more peace in my house and for Joshua and that's whats important, I need my son to be on a balanced mental level. The kids are at my house 3-4 nights a week, so I still spend plenty of time with them. Even Isabella and melina have been coming around more often now, probably cause the tension and demeanor in the house has changed. I love Brittany, she's a great person, but not such a good girlfriend, she has issues that cause too much stress on a relationship and the people around too. So for now it's best she's on her own with her parents and her babies. Joshua is okay with having the babies 1/2 time, and it lets each one of them have more time for themselves, without feeling like they are the only parent and the other one is out there having a party every night. Joel is still with me, lost his job and has been trying to find another one, he may end up moving back to Florida. I'll miss him but he is grown and he needs to do what's best for his future. I think Joshua will miss him most since they hang out alot more now that B is gone. I think Joel wants to go for his career, but he misses his fam and the babies. So not sure where that will go.Melina & Isabella are still at Dawn's, Isabella is 3 now and grown up so much, she is still half week with daddy and it's been hard for Melina but it's been civil and that's what is best for Isabella.We are all well, getting through every day with God's help and Grace. His mercy endureth forever, it's all we can count on 100%.My life isn't perfect, losing a bunch of work didn't change that. It didn't change my outlook, my confidence, my sense of worth, not totally, I still hate my body, probably more now since all this skin is horrid. But I have to learn to love myself, hopefully one day I will. I have 3 awesome kids, 3 awesome grandbabies, a few great friends, even if only by text, email, facebook :) and a man who loves me eternally. For all that I am grateful and thankful. I'm in my 50's now, it's gonna be okay, it's gonna get better.until we meet again!That's All For Now - Be Blessed In All Your Steps! Stay Strong! Judy