June 20, 2008 - *Hello* I lost 2 lbs this week!!! I've been stuck for weeks up a couple past goal then back to goal and up again My goodness! I wanted so bad to go under because the clinic scale scares me! But Debby my buddy told me that the scale outside the operating room matches her home scale so that is my prayer for today! I'm going to keep losing weight as much as I can in 5 weeks and pray that the stupid scale at clinic for pre-op check in and surgery day is correct.I am so so proud of myself today, I feel like I haven't even lost the other 26 lbs., the 2 lbs made me so happy. I was stuck up and down up and down but no lower than 236 so I was bummed but I keep on trucking. This journey is hard and long but I just have to look at the end prize. even though I am starting to get a little nervous. I am so glad Melina decided not to go on her trip to camp because I couldn't go to hospital without her there, I know I get anxiety when I'm facing a procedure I can't imagine how I am going to feel facing surgery. I hope my boys go too. but I'll understand if they don't they are not saying much about the surgery so I know they aren't in to it. Margie at work keeps telling me if I'm sure, that if I've lost before and I'm doing so good why can't I just keep doing it naturally. I told her no matter what you say I've made my decision. I have to do this. no choice. Work is good very quiet, I miss Maria but she won't be back until next week.so back to the grind.
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